It’s that time of year where I put up another one of those boring self-posts. I try to avoid them because really, I am a terrible writer of nonfiction and I feel like I have nothing interesting to say. 2011 was definitely a year of ups and downs. Emergency apartment moves, dealing with a lawsuit circling around the accident with my knee, traveling, comic book conventions, and the death of my father all played an important role in my mood and art throughout the year.
I think I can safely say that Zombie Killers has helped bring me back to a state of happiness and creativity that I hadn’t reached in a long time. There are probably a fair amount of people out there who would say that the art and writing of the comic aren’t all that spot on and, you know, I’m okay with that. Before having this comic to work on, I spent a good year wondering what I was supposed to be doing with myself. Was I allowed to be confident in my abilities? Was I allowed to try and promote myself and my art? Or did I really have no business at all stepping into an industry with monumental giants of creation at every twist and turn. I basically made a career out of learning about art without anyone really even knowing I could create anything due to being too afraid.
Well, I can safely say that at this point there is no turning back and I’m at the point where I probably couldn’t stop even if I wanted to. It’s terrifying. I am just one tiny little fish floating in a huge sea of sharks. Yet I turn around and see all of the wonderful people who have supported me both financially and emotionally. I look at my comic, which really is the embodiment of the silly, campy things that I enjoy; and I can’t help but feel proud of myself.
This year was one of the most tempestuous of my life, but I think I’ve finally done it. I think I’ve managed to step out of the self-made hold of artistic shame and isolation that I created and realize that allowing myself to love the art that I make was all I ever really needed. Putting myself out there was probably one of the most terrifying things I’ve ever done but I don’t regret it in the slightest.
Zombie Killers shoved me out into the world and now that I’ve encountered so many wonderful, supportive people (and also some not-so-supportive ones 😉 ) I am looking forward to 2012 and all of the progress, innovation, and fun it will bring.
I hope everyone’s year starts out on a good note and thanks to you all for all the love. 🙂